Cricket Garden

Sometimes a Cigar is just a Cigar 

The past week's cold temperatures have been the antithesis of my high fevers.  I got some kind of crud and though, on some level, it's a good time to be sick because what am I going to do in this weather, anyways, the combination has made me feel a futility. I like to feel productive, even if it's reading a book, but I'm too sick to do even that. 

So I lay on the couch watching brain numbing television. I did a 30 rock marathon, four seasons of the X-files, six episodes of "The Legend of Mick Dodge" and documentaries that have been on my bucket list. Because of so much free time I begin to question if what I am doing is just clearing something emotionally and since congested lungs can represent grief, I begin to do something very dangerous. I become analytical.

Now, I'm not a Pollyanna about these kinds of things. I have done a lot of emotional work - this is my fifth year of kabbalah, and before that I wasn't sitting at a desk for 45 years ignoring my feelings. I was out singing the blues, emoting and dumping a rainbow of emotional baggage on stages across America-that's what artistic expression is supposed to do, free you from the trappings of self-doubt and denial. 

As the artist becomes more and more fearless, not caring how others interpret or judge their expressive self, the magic begins for them whereas the revelation of the true creative soul can take place.  I was lucky enough to be able to be a participant in this magical process several times in my life - truly freeing me up from old emotional glue.

But honestly, thinking about any of this is a waste of time. If the point is to not deny our deep emotional states by escaping into the rational mind, then why am I thinking about it? I don't think it's important to "know" why. I think the point is to fully experience the feeling.  If I want to take on the full range of whatever sadness may be lurking deep in my psyche than the only way to do that is to feel it.  Not identify it, or think about it, or talk about it, or put a face on it or anything else.  Just feel it like I do when standing in the ocean allowing waves of that experience to wash over me. Only then can I be free. And here's the catch, it then becomes about the experience, not the feeling - which is really the point. It is the experience that leaves you with the wisdom for soul. Feelings are just tidbits of information wrapped in ego. 

So with all of that being said, really, in the end, I feel like I had a cold. Nothing more, nothing less. Emotions seem to be even and clear. Rationality once again within my grasp while reminding me of  Sigmund Freud, who replied to Carl Jung when he was expounding on how Freud's cigar smoking was symbolic of some deep phallic connection, "Carl" He said, "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." 

And sometimes a cold is just a cold.

From My Garden To Yours.......

Carrot and Spice Pudding

10 large carrots, cut in medium rounds and steamed until so

1/2 - 2/3 c. melted ghee

1 t. powdered ginger

1 T. cinnamon

1/4 t. nutmeg

1/2 t. sea salt

3-4 large eggs

1 t. vanilla

1. Preheat oven to 350°. Grease a 9x13 inch pan. For a thicker pudding, use a smaller dish or

casserole.

2. Place all ingredients in a high-power blender or a food processor and process until

creamy.

3. Pour into prepared pan and bake in pre-heated oven for 40 - 5- minutes or until set in the

center.

Variation: You can steam 1 large zucchini or summer squash along with the carrots to get in

some more veggies!

Winter at the Farmers' Market

Seasonal produce isn't just for the summer months: root vegetables, squash and fruits like apples and citrus from California and Florida are common in farmers' markets across the U.S. during winter months.

"If it's in season in the States and not coming from Argentina or Mexico, you can support farms on a family-level scale," says Erin Barnett, director of LocalHarvest, which connects family farmers and consumers. "U.S. shipping companies are getting more efficient, but it's more about buying directly from U.S. farms than reducing your carbon footprint in the winter. You're supporting more of a rural lifestyle that a lot of people have an affection for, as opposed to agribusiness. And you are able to ask the farmers questions about the food."

Indeed, supporting local farmers is becoming more important to U.S. consumers -- in 2008, 4 million people used LocalHarvest.org to find locally grown foods, up from 3 million in 2007. (You can too, using the LocalHarvest "Get Local Info" tool on the homepage of The Daily Green.) LocalHarvest lists 2,000 community-supported agriculture programs, around 100 of which sell direct to consumers through its site; if you want to stay local, you can also find 10,000 farms and almost 4,000 farmers' markets.